Messy Advice... | When Caring Feels Pointless

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This one's for anyone who's ever stared at a mountain of care,

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meals, texts, late night prayers, and thought,

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does any of this actually matter? Let's be honest,

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it's hard to keep pouring out when nothing seems to pour back. When

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you care deeply but the situation stays the same. When the

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people you're trying to help seem stuck or worse,

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unmoved. And after a while, faithfulness starts to feel

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like futility in a nicer outfit. You followed up for the third

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time, brought food, stayed available. You're

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not looking for applause, but you were hoping for at least a

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flicker of change. Instead, it it feels like you're investing in

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something with zero return. The spreadsheet of your soul

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starts whispering, is it even worth it? This is

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messy advice for people who care, for anyone wondering if faithful

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love still counts when the results don't. I'm your host,

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Johan, on the edge of helpful from somewhere between good intentions

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and should I even keep doing this. Today's

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question is one that's quiet but heavy.

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Let's get right into it. I've been loving,

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serving, and trying to be consistent, but I'm not

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seeing any fruit. How do I keep caring when it feels like

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nothing is changing? We've

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all been here, and if you've ever felt discouraged by the gap between

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your effort and the outcome, this episode is for you.

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According to a 2023 stats Canada report,

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nearly sixty percent of volunteers said that they struggle to see the

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long term impact of their work, but most continue anyway,

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hoping that it's worth it. So according to this, we're not giving

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up. We're just giving while wondering, does

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this really help anyone? And still showing up because hope's

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the kind of stubborn you can't always explain.

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So what do you do when your love feels like it's not going anywhere?

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Sometimes just showing up starts to feel like code for

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slowly burning out with a smile. You keep doing the right

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things, sending the text, delivering the meal,

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sitting with someone in grief. But when nothing changes,

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the voice in your head gets louder. Why bother?

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We wanna believe that every act of care sparks transformation.

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But often, it feels like maintenance, holding

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space, being present in something that still hurts,

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and it's hard not to wonder if it would even matter if you stopped.

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And, yes, sometimes it feels like the only transformation

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happening is in your own slowly fraying

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patience. Consider this scenario. You're

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walking alongside someone in recovery or deep grief.

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You've prayed with them, stuck by them, driven them,

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checked in, and yet, months later, it

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feels like they're stuck in the same struggle. No

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breakthrough. There hasn't been any turning point that you've been waiting

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for. Just the same ache on repeat. You're

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starting to feel like a benchwarmer in their story. You're cheering

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them on. You're present, but always outside the real action,

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and it's starting to feel personal. Let's take a look at some

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scripture. Let's get biblical. Biblical.

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We're looking at the seed parables in Mark four. So

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Jesus tells a story about a farmer who scatters seed and

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then, in what might be the least motivational moment in scripture,

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goes to bed. Not an all night vigil,

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no 10 soil improvement strategy,

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just sleeps and rises night and day,

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and the seed sprouts and grows, though he doesn't know

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how. That line always gets me. He does not know

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how. In a culture that celebrates insight,

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strategy, and tight control over outcomes,

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Jesus offers a parable about holy cluelessness.

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The farmer does his part. He shows up. He sows,

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and then he lets go of the outcome. There's no

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productivity chart, no time lapse footage.

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The growth happens beneath the surface in mystery

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with zero feedback loop. The farmer keeps trusting

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the process even when the field looks exactly the same as it

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did the day before and the day before that. This

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isn't Jesus glorifying laziness. This is

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Jesus telling us, hey. The kingdom doesn't grow by hustle.

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It grows by trust. Because real love, like

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seeds, usually works in silence and rarely on

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your timeline. Don't confuse silence for failure.

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You don't have to know how it works. You just have to trust that it

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does. You see, faithful care doesn't always come with

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proof, and loving someone well doesn't guarantee that they'll

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change. But what you're doing still matters,

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not because of what it produces, but because of who you're becoming

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in the process. And that's the real fruit. And love

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that shows up without a scoreboard, that's kingdom stuff.

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Your faithfulness might not be flashy, but it's deeply

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formative. For them, maybe, but it's

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definitely formative for you. So if you're tired of

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being the consistent one, the caring one,

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the still here one, know this. You're

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not weak for wanting results, but you're strong

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for loving without them. And maybe someone around you needs

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that kind of quiet encouragement too.

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Hey. If you got a question or if you wanna get in on a group

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of like minded people, head over to our Care Impact podcast group

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on Facebook and join us there. And hey, you can check out our website

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at careimpact.ca if you wanna find out more about the work of Care

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Impact and our podcast. Until next time, keep

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loving, keep laughing. And if you're still showing up with no

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applause and no payoff, you're probably doing it

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exactly right. And always remember to stay

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curious.